Ruin it With Prince Charming [6]

1.  Drive to his place at midnight because he says he’s bored and could use the company. Awake from your sleep, get dressed, and fly fly, Mr. Powers!

2.  “Cook” him popcorn and kool-aid for dinner and call it a meal. (Courtesy of ‘Why Men Love Bitches,’ except the book actually supported the idea.)

3.  Equally bad as #2, cook him a seven-course meal a week into the relationship.

4.  Leave a pair of pink panties in his car and/or bathroom to mark your territory. As a matter of fact, might as well put up a “Just Married” sign with tacky high-lighter pink that’s blinding as hell.

5.  Cancel your weekly yoga because he called and wants to see you.

6.  Nag him because he doesn’t do nice things anymore. Question: Are YOU doing too many nice things? Hmm.

7.  Expect a play-by-play of how his time is spent when not with you. How many potato chips did he eat, with which hand, and on which sofa? Are you sure he wasn’t standing in the kitchen while multi-tasking with a phone call AND eating potato chips? Uh oh…

8.  Always, always, ALWAYS be available to see him. No, he will not take your company for granted, you silly-goose! Drop those extra courses you were thinking of taking.

9.Verbally express your need and/or desire for a long-term relationship within the first two-three dates.

10.  Ask him if you could see ex-photos. It will not turn out negative.